I hope your holiday weekend was a blast! For me it was a weekend to stay home and regroup, maybe work a little and avoid the crowds and the noise! I’m not a big fan of loud noises.
Speaking of noise, this last week my husband asked me a question that blew my mind! I learned something new about myself and I have to share as I know it will add more meaning in your life too! I have a challenge for you at the end of this post in regards to this, so I hope you read to the end! Here is the story behind it all:
I’ve been with my husband for 16 years. And through the years I’ve known he has had a hearing problem. He’s a drummer so he has taken full responsibility – for most of it at least. Each time he had a hearing test he was told he had tinnitus and there was nothing he could do. Hearing aids would only amplify the already loud ringing and hissing he experienced 24 hours a day. So he was very frustrated to say the least. And I was frustrated too – repeating something 4 times so he could read my lips good enough to halfway understand what I said – each time I spoke getting louder and louder to the point of sounding really irritated (try it, you’ll see what I mean!)
After putting up with this for 16 years (me at least, for him it has been longer) I finally told him that I was going to search until I found a solution. And surprisingly I did – in less than 10 minutes! I found a new doctor, he called and got an appointment and within a few days he had hearing aids! Hearing aids that worked for his tinnitus. OMG! This was one week ago today and I can’t tell you how much life has changed since then!
As the doctor showed me how much he could hear (through charts and actual demonstrations) I could not figure out how he survived. I mean he is a salesman! And pretty darn good too! And his hearing loss was to the point of disability. He was pretty much “legally deaf” if there is such a thing. He got really good at reading people’s lips while looking them in the eyes. This man is amazing!
So the first day he got them, he asked me “Is it normal to hear your own voice in your head when you talk?” He was serious. I almost cried. Over the next couple of days watching him sit in silence listening and looking around to the sounds he heard was like watching those YouTube videos where the babies get hearing aids for the first time. And I did cry.
What he asked me next however, really changed my life. We were sitting outside and he asked …
Do you hear the wind?
What? Of course I didn’t hear it. I tried to hear it and I couldn’t. I wondered how much else I wasn’t hearing. I imagine that I stopped hearing it around the same time I quit tasting water or feeling the air around me on my skin. When did I get so overwhelmed with everything else going on that I lost the ability to hear the wind?
These days we worry about how kids (AND adults) are getting desensitized to violence by video games, the constant news reports and life in general. I remember when we were kids if there was a murder in our town it was HUGE and scary and only happened once in a blue moon, or less. Now it is the norm.
But we have desensitized too, not just from that but from our innocent lives in general. From the taste of our food, to the rainbow of colors we see, and to the noises all around us. We have lost our curiosity and our wonder of nature, of life.
I have spent the last few mornings sitting outside on the deck savoring every sip of my coffee, looking at the trees and the sky and LISTENING. It’s amazing the things I taste, see and hear that I had taken for granted. I have laid on my back in the grass and looked at the clouds – seeing the shapes of dogs, angels and monsters. I have brought back my childhood curiosity and have decided to keep it around.
I heard my friend, the great astrologer Debra Silverman, once say that SILENT and LISTEN have the same letters. It stuck with me for many reasons but it now makes more sense to me than ever. All you have to do is be silent and listen, sometimes TO the silence, to really hear. I have witnessed this and participated in it this last week. And it has changed my life. It has deepened my relationship with my husband as I have stepped into HIS shoes and re-awakened my curiosity for life.
So here is my challenge for you: Sit outside in the morning before you start your day. Sit in silence and discover what you hear. Can YOU hear the wind? I’m guessing it will take me a few more weeks before I do, but I now know it is there to hear. I guarantee that by doing this, you will increase the depth of your life. I can’t explain why, but somehow it puts you in that place of gratitude that creates a more aware state of consciousness.
Look at the world through the eyes of a baby – sight, sounds, taste, touch. Try it on and see how it feels. Regain your childhood wonder and curiosity. Quit being so serious all the time, you are missing out on life!
Let me know your thoughts below and please comment on how this experience is for you after you give it a try!
Laurie, that blog was the best yet! I never knew he had a hearing problem and the news about his new hearing aids, and what followed, is awesome! I am so happy for both of you. Mom/MaLa
Wow, how did you not know? You must have thought he was quite the rude fellow, ignoring you all the time! Actually there are a lot of people that didn’t realize his hearing loss was so extreme, he didn’t tell people – for some reason there was shame surrounding this. But holy moly! You should see him now! It’s amazing how a change like this can be so transformative!
Thank you Laura for this wonderful story and reminder. I am always teaching about listening and going about the day with a curiosity for what is actually going on inside and outside.
I will savor my coffee outside in silence and take it in.
What a gift this blog is to everyone!!
Thank you Molly! We have certainly had the weather to allow us to engage with the beauty of life in the morning outside with our glorious coffee! It’s been a win/win for sure!
“Be still and know that I am God” such a simple statement but it has the power to change lives as you have discovered.
I am so happy for you and your husband, what a wonderful gift you have both been given.
I tell my clients all the time “get out in nature and just BE”, those moments
Have a blessed day.
Thank you Mary Beth! It truly is amazing!